


Bend It That Way

by tqpannie



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Erotica, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, M/M, Rimming, Slash, The Quidditch Pitch: The Changing Room
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-01-20
Updated: 2007-01-20
Packaged: 2018-10-26 06:35:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10781538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tqpannie/pseuds/tqpannie
Summary: When their home is infested with singing Hippogriffs Ron decides a weekend away is what he and Harry need.





	Bend It That Way

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Annie, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Quidditch Pitch](http://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Quidditch_Pitch), which went offline in 2015 when the hosting expired, at a time I was not able to renew it. I contacted Open Doors, hoping to preserve the archive using an old backup, and began importing these works as an Open Doors-approved project in April 2017. Open Doors e-mailed all authors about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact us using the e-mail address on [The Quidditch Pitch collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/thequidditchpitch/profile).

  
Author's notes: Written for [](http://madam-minnie.livejournal.com/profile)[**madam_minnie**](http://madam-minnie.livejournal.com/) as her Christmas smut. Merry Christmas, Minnie.  Thanks to thetriomakesmehot for the beta!   


* * *

I can't decide if I should kiss Fred and George, or murder them in their sleep. On one hand if they hadn't given us the _Hippogriffs in a Bag,_ I might never have made a move on Harry. On the other hand-Bloody bastards didn't tell me the Hippogriffs would sing and that there was no way of getting rid of them.   
  
It started off completely innocent. I owed Fred and George a favor after they "overheard" me confessing my not so platonic feelings for Harry to Hermione. They'd been blackmailing me for months. Hermione was offended, but I wouldn't let her intervene. I would tell Harry when I was good and ready, but until then, I was forced to do the twins' bidding.  
  
I tried _Dress in a Box_ \--just add water the label said. Harry thought I'd been hit in the head by a Bludger when he came home and found in me in a wedding dress. I tried _Homoerectus,_ which was a tiny piece of candy that was supposed to make me stand up straight. Well, I did stand up straight-my cock stood at attention for over twenty-four hours this past Christmas, at The Burrow, and I'm telling you that Mum noticed and offered me a Lockhart book to "help" the situation.  
  
I thought there would be no harm in a bag of miniature Hippogriffs. I was wrong of course, dead wrong, and during their fifth chorus of _It's Raining Men_ I tried to banish them from the flat.   
  
That was a bad idea-they multiplied.  
  
They started a new song though, and even now it's stuck in my head.  
  
_Oh what a lovely bunch of coconuts. All of them standing in a row..._  
  
Harry begged me to make them stop.   
  
Harry pleaded with me to floo Fred and George to come get them.  
  
Harry threatened to hex me.   
  
That's when I knew I had to do something-anything. In a fit of desperation, I Apparated us to _Bedknobs and Broomsticks_.   
  
"Ron?" Harry nudged my side with his elbow. "Would you mind telling me why we're here?"  
  
I think I was speechless for several moments and I felt my palms begin to sweat. I rubbed them several times on my jeans and shook my head to clear it.  
  
"Ron, you didn't leave your tongue behind did you?" Harry asked with genuine concern in his voice. "Let me see."  
  
Images flashed before my eyes of what I'd like to show Harry with my tongue. Images of him squirming as I fucked his arse with my tongue, images of running my tongue up and down the length of his cock, and images of my tongue lapping at his nipples invaded my mind, and I actually squeaked when he touched my arm.   
  
  
"Got us away," I took a deep breath and tried to will my erection away, "from the hippogriffs."  
  
"Yes but this-" Harry's voice lowered as we watched a couple dash inside the hotel doors. "Do you know what this is?"  
  
"A hotel, Harry," I rubbed the back of my neck and sighed. "Look I know it's a bit off-"  
  
"Ron," Harry hissed. "It's a fantasy hotel!"  
  
"It won't kill us to stay here one night."  
  
"Ron!"  
  
"Look Harry, they have a gift shoppe, we'll request a room with a hot tub, and try to relax..."  
  
"Relax?"  
  
"Yes, you know relax. You know, where we just let a nice hot soak take our cares away."  
  
I looked down at him and realized it was a mistake straight away. He was blushing and it was damn near the sexiest thing I'd ever seen. I had to resort to using my worst memory to banish the thought of pulling his hand to my cock and showing him just what my real fantasy was. Trust me when I say that images of Hagrid and Dobby filling your head are just more than any man should handle. Bloody Hell, I didn't even know that Hagrid could bend that way! "We don't have any clothes or toothbrushes!"   
  
"I reckon we can get those things from the gift shoppe," I sighed. "Come on Harry, where's your sense of adventure?"  
  
"Where the hell are your brothers?" Harry grumbled. "And why did you ever agree to test their bloody products?"  
  
"Let's just go inside and get a room," I said, desperately wanting to change the subject. "They said the Hippogriffs would simply evaporate after twenty four hours and we can go back to our flat."  
  
"Bloody Hippogriffs," Harry muttered and quickly followed me inside the building.   
  
I got us a room, _The Red Hot Lovers Room_ , and requested that we not be disturbed. Harry, of course, was in the gift shoppe purchasing a toothbrush. _The man is obsessed with his teeth_.   
  
I didn't realize he'd bought us both swimming costumes.   
  
I opened the door to our room, and I could feel the blush rising to my cheeks.   
  
There was an awful lot of red and the heart over the bed was almost horrifying in its utter-well honestly there's no real word for it.  
  
  
"This is," Harry began and stepped inside the room. "Well, simply hideous!"  
  
"It's red-" I wheezed and shook my head. "This was the only room they had-"  
  
"No, Mate," Harry began laughing and tossed his bag on the bed. "Red doesn't begin to describe it-it's like being around a room full of Weasley's with Lockhart's personality."  
  
I chuckled in and began exploring the room. It was badly furnished and more than a bit gaudy. I reached the small area with the hot tub and swallowed hard. It was heart-shaped...tiny, and I nearly died when I realized I was going to be in there with Harry.   
  
"I need a drink," I muttered as Harry came into the room.   
  
"Mate, why are there mirrors around the hot tub?"   
  
"I reckon if you want to-" I lowered my voice to a whisper, "watch yourselves."  
  
I sucked in a deep breath as I pictured watching Harry...watching him come undone in the mirrors, and let me remind you my cock is a bloody traitor. It sprung to attention and I wondered if I could get away with wanking in the loo.  
  
"That's...you mean to say...fuck."  
  
I figured blurting out ‘yes, please' might not go over too well. I waved my wand to turn on the faucets and sighed as tiny heart shaped bubbles floated into the air. I may want to bugger my best mate, but this wasn't how I pictured the setting.   
  
"Right then," I muttered, and stripped off my shirt. "I reckon I'll have a soak now."  
  
"Wait!"  
  
Harry grabbed my arm and my entire body twitched. He didn't seem to notice and he pulled me back towards the bedroom.   
  
"I bought you a swimming costume."  
  
He tossed me the smallest bit of fabric that I had ever seen and it was white.   
  
It would be entirely too revealing, and I reckon I was a bit shy about it.  
  
"My boxers will be fine," I muttered and Harry shook his head.   
  
"Ron, you went commando this morning," he said as he pulled another tiny bit of fabric from the bag. "You were complaining that you didn't have clean pants and decided to just banish all your boxers to the North Pole."  
  
"Oh."  
  
Harry was tugging off his clothes and my cock twitched in response. I couldn't stay there with my cock at half-mast while he changed. I certainly couldn't change in front of him, because I wasn't sure how I was going to explain the fact that my todger was rising because of him.   
  
So I dashed to the hot tub before he could strip down completely.   
  
I changed in record time, and after figuring out the snaps on the sides of the tiniest swim costume on earth, I climbed into the hot tub.   
  
My heart nearly stopped when Harry strolled into the room wearing the same outfit in gold-Gryffindor gold. I'd seen Harry naked before-at school, but not since we'd reached the ripe old age of 20.   
  
His stomach was sculpted and there was a thin line of hair that trailed from just below his bellybutton and downward to the waist of this swimming costume. I could see the outline of his cock pressing against the thin fabric, and I think I caught a glimpse of his balls. I couldn't stop looking at him, and my cock was painfully hard by this time.   
  
"Ron?"  
  
I forced my eyes upwards and looked at his face.   
"Yeah?"   
  
Merlin my voice was hoarse and I sounded breathless-he had to know that he affected me.   
  
"Is something wrong?"  
  
He was smirking, and it was a smile I hadn't really seen before. I'd seen all his smiles, but this one was almost predatory and it sent shivers down my spine.   
  
"Is it supposed to bend that way?" I blurted out. "I mean, mine doesn't bend that way!"  
  
"What?"  
  
Right, so it wasn't really clever of me to bring up my own cock.  
  
Harry was staring at me as if I had lost my mind, and I'll be honest, I probably had.   
  
"Yours bends to the left," I licked my lips and checked out his package again. "Mine bends to the right."  
  
"It does not," Harry shook his head. "I've seen you naked."  
  
"Well you've not seen me in-"  
  
My voice trailed off, and Harry gave me an appraising look. He ran a hand through his hair, mussing it up more, and I had to bite my lip to stifle a groan. I think he was trying to kill, me but I'm not sure I cared.   
  
"Let's see then," Harry climbed into the hot tub. "Lift up and let me take a look, because I know you bend to the left."  
  
Harry sank into the water and gave a soft sigh of contentment. He kept his eyes on me, and I couldn't help but wonder what his hands were doing under the water.   
  
"I'm not sure that's a good idea."  
  


"Oh go on, Ron," Harry blew a bubble in my direction and I couldn't help but stare at his lips. "I showed you, now you show me."  
  
"We're too old for show and tell."  
  
"Are you chicken?"  
  
I hate being called a chicken and the bloody bastard knows it. I lifted my hips out of the water and leaned back to allow the water to reveal what I'd been trying to hide. I kept my eyes shut tightly, hoping that Harry wouldn't hit me when he saw my erection, and I held my breath waiting for his response.   
  
I heard a splash of water, and seconds later I felt rough hands yanking the snaps on the sides of my suit open. I had just opened my eyes when I felt warmth surrounding my cock, and when I looked down I saw the top of Harry's head.   
  
"Har..rr..yyy...."  
  
  
He hummed around my shaft as he took me deeper into his mouth. Harry's hands were running up and down my legs, and I could feel his tongue flicking the underside of my cock as his head bobbed up and down my length.   
  
"Oh fuck...yeah...suck me..."   
  
I was really too far-gone to give a damn if Harry knew how I felt. Maybe I didn't have to tell him, because maybe he knew me as well as I know him. I turned my head slightly and my hips jerked upwards when I caught a glimpse of us in the mirror. My hands fell to his head and I threaded my fingers through his hair as I watched my cock disappear and reappear through his pursed lips.   
  
I cursed several more times, and Harry's hands slid up my chest to rake across my nipples. He knew just how to twist them so that it felt brilliant-not too soft like girls do, but not so hard that it hurt badly. His mouth was like a vice around my cock, his lips pulling my hard shaft, and I couldn't help but tighten my grip on his hair.   
  
My hips rose and fell, I could hear the water sloshing out of the tub onto the floor, and I continued to watch him giving me the best blowjob of my life. He was devouring me like a man starved for food, and I was more than happy to let him.   
  
"Harry-fuck so good...need you..."  
  
Harry looked up at me and I was overpowered by the lust in his eyes. He slowly sucked his way back to the tip of my cock and lapped at the precum spilling over the head.   
"Do you want me?"   
  
Our eyes locked, and a smile played at the corners of his mouth. The fact there was just a bit of precum lingering at the corner only turned me on more. I slid my hand down his chest and palmed his cock. I pressed the heel of my hand hard against him and rotated it in a slow circle.   
  
"Yes...so badly..."  
  
"Is that why Fred and George have been blackmailin-"  
  
"How did you-"   
  
He pressed his hips forward and rubbed against my hand. I could feel him throbbing against my palm and moved my free hand to the snap on the right side of his costume. He groaned when I licked my lips, and his eyes rolled back in his head when I took his cock in my hand and began to stroke him.   
  
"Hermione-"  
  
"Brilliant-remind me to-"  
  
"Thank her?"   
  
"Reckon I should."  
  
I released him to pull him towards me, and I lapped up the precum at the corner of his mouth before kissing him fully. Our tongues met, brushed, and tangled together as we snogged. His body was pressed fully against mine and our hips were lined up perfectly. We ground our hips together, our cocks sliding against each other, and my hands found his arse. I cupped his cheeks in my hands, my thumbs brushed over his pucker, and he tore his lips from mine.  
  
"I want-" Harry's head fell back as I pressed my thumb against his hole, "you to fuck me."  
  
Something in me must have snapped a bit and a haze seem to cloud my vision.   
  
"Turn around and brace your hands against the edge of tub."  
  
Even I was surprised by the growl in my voice.   
  
I was even more surprised when I saw the gooseflesh break out on Harry's body.   
  
Harry complied and I ran my hands up and down his back, squeezed his shoulders, and I stood to trail kisses over his shoulder, down his spine. When I parted his cheeks to trail my tongue down his cleft, he pushed back against me.  
  
I've always been a bit of an arse man and Harry's was perfect.   
  
I circled his hole with the tip of my tongue as I slid my hand around to stroke his cock. He jerked when I worked my way inside him. His head fell forward and I loved the desperate moans that escaped his lips.   
  
_More..._  
  
_Please..._  
  
_Fuck me with that tongue...so good..._  
  
My cock was throbbing by this point, and I could have come just listening to him. Harry was rocking back and forth, his cock was pulsing in my hand, and when I replaced my tongue with two fingers, he let out a keening moan.   
  
"I want to fuck you," I growled against his arse cheeks. "I want to fuck you hard."  
  
"Then do it," Harry grunted, as I slid a third finger inside him. "Lubricous!"  
  
I stood on shaking legs and repositioned him so that he could see us in the mirror. I felt possessive-I wanted to make him mine, and I wanted him to see me claim him. I wanted him to know he belonged to me.  
  
I did the same spell on my cock before pressing the tip against his hole. I threaded my hand through his hair and turned his head towards the mirror.   
  
"Watch us-"  
  
He groaned as I pressed my cock inside him, pushing past the tight ring of muscle, and he shifted his hips back to take me to the hilt.   
  
I almost blacked out then and there from the pleasure!   
  
I leaned forward slightly and rotated my hips. I saw his cock twitch in the mirror and I closed my fist around him again.   
  
"Are you mine?"   
  
"Yes..."  
  
"I'm going to fuck you now."  
  


I began slowly, and I couldn't take my eyes off the two of us. His eyes were darker and I could see just a peek of his cock as I stroked him. My cock was sliding in and out of his arse, and I couldn't help but notice that he was watching. It fueled my lust and sent me spiraling out of control.  
  
I increased my pace, my hips snapped as I drove deep inside him, and I could tell when I hit the sweet spot. Harry's back bowed and his entire body tightened. I bent my knees slightly and angled myself so I'd hit that spot each time I drove my cock back inside him.  
  
"You..." I panted as I pulled completely out. ". . . like to watch."  
  
I drove my hips forward, burying myself in his arse, and I felt his cock throb in my hand. It hardened further and I fucked him harder.  
  
"Yes...like to watch...love seeing you like this."  
  
"Dreamed about us like this," I growled out, as heat began spreading outward from my belly. "I dreamed about fucking you."  
  
"Fuck..."  
  
The sounds of our bodies slapping together, the smell of his wet flesh, and the water sloshing over the edge of the tub were driving me closer to orgasm. I was on the edge, but I wanted to make him come first. I wanted to see him lose control like I had.  
  
"I wanted to fuck you when we were in school," I leaned forward and whispered in his ear. "I wanted to surprise you in the Quidditch locker room."  
  
He was moaning my name now, and I could feel him trembling.  
  
"You should have said-"  
  
Harry's voice trailed off as I nipped the muscles on his shoulder. I pulled out completely and slammed back inside him. I twisted my hand around his shaft and I felt him pulsing in my hand.  
  
"Ron...gonna come..." he moaned, and I watched his face contort in pleasure as I hit his sweet spot again.  
  
"Come for me, Harry."  
  
He gave a hoarse shout, and I watched as he spilt over my hand. Harry clenched his arse around me and that was all it took. I bit his shoulder hard to muffle my shout. Stars filled my vision and when I locked my eyes on Harry, he mouthed my name. His name bounced against the tiles and echoed in my head as I came deep inside him. My entire body shook, and my knees slowly gave out. I slid out of him and slowly sat back down in the tub.  
  
"Blimey," I breathed. "That was..."  
  
"Magic..."  
  
Harry turned and straddled my waist. Our lips met in a soft kiss and our tongues lazily explored each other's mouths until my stomach growled.  
  
"So, do we need to have a talk about our feelings?"  
  
My eyes widened and I shook my head, "I'm pants at the whole talking thing. Let's just agree we're together and that we're best mates."  
  
"I think you marked me as yours," Harry pointed out my teeth marks on his shoulder. "So now that you have me, what are you going to do with me?"  
  
My stomach growled again and he laughed, "After dinner that is."  
  
"Well, I've had some fantasies involving chocolate and your-"  
  
Harry kissed me soundly on the lips and grinned, "Chocolate makes everything better."  
  
I nodded and pulled him to me again, "Remind me to send Fred and George a gift."  
  
  
Now we're snuggled in this awfully gaudy bed watching some movie on the Muggle telly.  
  
Thank Merlin for singing Hippogriffs.


End file.
